smile! you're on candid meme!
She's wicked awesome and has a wicked smile (that's a good thing!) and she picked me! Wicked pissah!
One body part you’d like to change? My first thought was "Well, duh, Lemony, it's gotta be your elbow!" but then I remembered my ass is still back there, so now I'm all conflicted. My elbow is perfectly lovely, but it crackles like a bowl of Rice Krispies swimming in skim milk every time I bend it, and hey, it's an elbow. It bends a lot. It's annoying and just a wee bit painful, but my ass has recently applied for its own zip code, so you can see my dilemma.
Wait! I know!
You know how some women can birth three giant babies and still have perfectly flat little bellies with nary a stretch mark? I'm not one of them. I'll live with cereal elbows and my own zip code if the disaster zone that is my mid-section goes poof. I don't need zig-zags of purple to prove I have three kids. I have three kids to prove that.
Describe your ideal Saturday. Waking up alone, in a quiet house, and drinking a leisurely cup of coffee while reading the entire paper. The rest of the day is lost in a blur of adult conversation, a good book, a long walk with Lemony Mutt, yummy vegetarian wraps and iced coffee eaten in an actual cafe, Damien Rice CD's, and a long, hot, steamy bath in the bubbly tub.
And then, just when I start to think I could get used to such things, chaos returns to Lemony Villa and I remember that I love everything and everybody contributing to the craziness.
What have you got for leftovers in your fridge? Four cartons of Chinese food, including the fried shrimp Mr. Lemony insisted upon and ate none of, grilled chicken, Spanish rice, steel-milled oatmeal from breakfast this morning that nobody else will eat so I'm all set for breakfast tomorrow, too, and the last of the homemade mac 'n cheese I made two days ago.
You get to travel back in time for one day. How far back do you go and why? December 11, 1991, because I'm so afraid there are so many things I forgot to say, like thank you, i love you, safe journey...i love you...
If you had one hour with the President, what would you say to him? "Karma is real, and she's a bitch."
One body part you’d never change? - I am so not going with the zip-coded parts. I'll go with my eyes. Green goes good with freckles.
Your most favorite thing about motherhood? Little hands that look like stars. Sleepy lips. Arms wrapped around my legs in the grocery store. Popcorn and ice cream dinners. Expectant, glittering eyes. The quiet that settles when they're not home. The cacophony they bring with them when they return. Freckles. Scabby knees. Pigtails. Gapped tooth smiles. Temper tantrums...
Oh, wait, I got carried away there, didn't I?
Ultra-violet rays or tan-in-a-bottle? I am a member of the Cult of Jergens, baby.
You have an unlimited expense account; what three things do you purchase first? College and grad school educations for the Lemonettes. A house for my mother. A quaint, dormered, Cape Cod-style house big enough to host a commune on, yes, Cape Cod. Oceanfront, of course.
Your least favorite thing about motherhood? Vomit.
It’s 10:00 p.m., do you know where your children are? The youngest is sleeping, the middle is, too, and the oldest is either starting her bedtime ritual or at a football game/gymnastics practice/movie/date/sleepover. So far so good with keeping track of the teen. I fully expect that to change in the next year or so.
Yes, I'm having a stroke. Right now, even.
Soul sistah, Happy Bluebird, and Ravin' babe, I pick you! And yes, that's wicked pissah.
One body part you’d like to change? My first thought was "Well, duh, Lemony, it's gotta be your elbow!" but then I remembered my ass is still back there, so now I'm all conflicted. My elbow is perfectly lovely, but it crackles like a bowl of Rice Krispies swimming in skim milk every time I bend it, and hey, it's an elbow. It bends a lot. It's annoying and just a wee bit painful, but my ass has recently applied for its own zip code, so you can see my dilemma.
Wait! I know!
You know how some women can birth three giant babies and still have perfectly flat little bellies with nary a stretch mark? I'm not one of them. I'll live with cereal elbows and my own zip code if the disaster zone that is my mid-section goes poof. I don't need zig-zags of purple to prove I have three kids. I have three kids to prove that.
Describe your ideal Saturday. Waking up alone, in a quiet house, and drinking a leisurely cup of coffee while reading the entire paper. The rest of the day is lost in a blur of adult conversation, a good book, a long walk with Lemony Mutt, yummy vegetarian wraps and iced coffee eaten in an actual cafe, Damien Rice CD's, and a long, hot, steamy bath in the bubbly tub.
And then, just when I start to think I could get used to such things, chaos returns to Lemony Villa and I remember that I love everything and everybody contributing to the craziness.
What have you got for leftovers in your fridge? Four cartons of Chinese food, including the fried shrimp Mr. Lemony insisted upon and ate none of, grilled chicken, Spanish rice, steel-milled oatmeal from breakfast this morning that nobody else will eat so I'm all set for breakfast tomorrow, too, and the last of the homemade mac 'n cheese I made two days ago.
You get to travel back in time for one day. How far back do you go and why? December 11, 1991, because I'm so afraid there are so many things I forgot to say, like thank you, i love you, safe journey...i love you...
If you had one hour with the President, what would you say to him? "Karma is real, and she's a bitch."
One body part you’d never change? - I am so not going with the zip-coded parts. I'll go with my eyes. Green goes good with freckles.
Your most favorite thing about motherhood? Little hands that look like stars. Sleepy lips. Arms wrapped around my legs in the grocery store. Popcorn and ice cream dinners. Expectant, glittering eyes. The quiet that settles when they're not home. The cacophony they bring with them when they return. Freckles. Scabby knees. Pigtails. Gapped tooth smiles. Temper tantrums...
Oh, wait, I got carried away there, didn't I?
Ultra-violet rays or tan-in-a-bottle? I am a member of the Cult of Jergens, baby.
You have an unlimited expense account; what three things do you purchase first? College and grad school educations for the Lemonettes. A house for my mother. A quaint, dormered, Cape Cod-style house big enough to host a commune on, yes, Cape Cod. Oceanfront, of course.
Your least favorite thing about motherhood? Vomit.
It’s 10:00 p.m., do you know where your children are? The youngest is sleeping, the middle is, too, and the oldest is either starting her bedtime ritual or at a football game/gymnastics practice/movie/date/sleepover. So far so good with keeping track of the teen. I fully expect that to change in the next year or so.
Yes, I'm having a stroke. Right now, even.
Soul sistah, Happy Bluebird, and Ravin' babe, I pick you! And yes, that's wicked pissah.
3 Comments:
Did you just meme me? is that too many mes in a row?
Okay...after I whine, bitch and moan about how the allergist today sucked away my will to live, I'll respond to your call.
Oh yeah and LOL LOL about your answers! I wonder...do all mommies fantasize about being alone?
lmao, you kill me, woman!
well shoot, you pick me, and now i have to try and top that?
♥
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