things that make me go hmmmmm
Mr. Lemony, a bloody brilliant software designer with a Big Deal Job who handles global accounts and manages global employees in his sleep is completely confounded by laundry sorting. Today I folded the load he "threw in" to "help" me...one pair of jeans, a towel, a pajama top belonging to Lemony Child, a pair of purple socks, a pair of green socks, and a potholder.
A potholder.
What the hell, man?
Lemony Mutt not only hears the things I say to her, she obeys me. Now I don't expect my children to be perfect little drone-like beings, but if the dog can understand drop it, leave it, sit, stay, come, wait, hush, and play dead surely the others (who tell me they have more advanced brains than the dog) can understand stop fighting with your brother/sister/socks/homework/mother and if you can't stop at least be quiet about it!
I mean, it's not like I'm asking them to play dead or anything, you know?
My cats can puke out enough fur for me to knit a new cat almost daily. One is 17 years old and the other is 4 years old. Now physics was never my strongest subject, so I'm not sure about the science behind the whole cat to fur ratio thing, but doesn't logic dictate that if a cat eats enough of its own fur to puke out a whole new self it should be bald? Especially after 17 years of puking??
Because you know if I was choking down my own hair and horking it back out I'd be bald by now.
And, also:
Teenagers going from happy to nuclear in six point two nanoseconds.
70 degree days on November 30th in New England.
Anyone?
A potholder.
What the hell, man?
Lemony Mutt not only hears the things I say to her, she obeys me. Now I don't expect my children to be perfect little drone-like beings, but if the dog can understand drop it, leave it, sit, stay, come, wait, hush, and play dead surely the others (who tell me they have more advanced brains than the dog) can understand stop fighting with your brother/sister/socks/homework/mother and if you can't stop at least be quiet about it!
I mean, it's not like I'm asking them to play dead or anything, you know?
My cats can puke out enough fur for me to knit a new cat almost daily. One is 17 years old and the other is 4 years old. Now physics was never my strongest subject, so I'm not sure about the science behind the whole cat to fur ratio thing, but doesn't logic dictate that if a cat eats enough of its own fur to puke out a whole new self it should be bald? Especially after 17 years of puking??
Because you know if I was choking down my own hair and horking it back out I'd be bald by now.
And, also:
Teenagers going from happy to nuclear in six point two nanoseconds.
70 degree days on November 30th in New England.
Anyone?
5 Comments:
I'd like to first extend my genuine thanks for that whole horking-up-your-own-hair visual. *wince*
Then I'll add this one:
"Mama can I have some hot cocoa?"
"Yep, after I get the chicken in the oven, OK?"
"OK Mama...it's so hard to wait."
"I know, love. I won't be long."
Child comes back into the kitchen at the preCISE second I'm putting the chicken into the oven and stands there, watching, as I pull a mug from the cabinet.
I pass her to get to the pantry and am standing in front of her, fumbling into the box of Swiss Miss for a packet, as she emits a whine that should have, by all rights, earned her at least a daytime Emmy:
"MAAAAAAAAma are you eeeeeeever going to get my hot cooocoaaaaaaa?"
I could only stand there holding the box, blinking, in a deafening stuporous silence.
xoxo
- It was 70 the last two days. Weird but nice. Now it's cold and rainy.
- you have people that obey? I am so envious.
- your laundry situation is exactly why Mr. MFBA is not allowed to do laundry. He also loads the dishwasher "wrong" which drives me crazy.
- I have always wondered about the cat to fur ratio. Mine just seem to vomit for fun.
- The 11-year old became child from hell b/c her friend was over. I wanted to smack her.
Ooh...Lemony Teen is going through that awkward teenage phase, huh?? My condolences. I'm sure I'll be singing the blues in the next 8-9 years myself!
I am sure your weather changed, if the folks at the Weather Channel were right but 70 degrees in NOVEMBER? Almost December?? WTF!? Here, have my snow! LOL!!!
The potholder in the wash is a bizarre phenomenon. And, my cats puke so much I'd expect them to be perpetually starving, but nope. :)
Oh, the cat puke, ever so wonderful. I'm so tired of cat puke -- I'm almost ready to make a new cat of the horked up stuff and toss my gatos out!
And the potholder thing ... you mean it's not just my husband?
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